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How often do we stop listening right before someone tells us what they really mean?
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I've been on both sides of this. As a leader, partner, parent, and friend, I've moved conversations forward too quickly, missing what wasn't yet said. And I've also been the one with more to share, holding back what really mattered.
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​📚Michael Bungay Stanier suggests the AWE Question could be "The Best Coaching Question in the World." It's simple but effective: "𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗲𝗹𝘀𝗲?"
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Three words with remarkable impact.
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𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗔𝗪𝗘 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗲𝗲 𝗮𝗺𝗮𝘇𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀:
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It uncovers hidden possibilities. The first answer someone gives is rarely the complete picture. There's almost always more—another angle, a deeper concern, an additional option. "And what else?" invites them to keep going.
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It keeps you quiet and curious longer. Instead of jumping in with solutions, advice, or your own story, you stay in listening mode.
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It also buys you time to understand what's actually going on. Surface-level answers can be what someone thinks you want to hear. The second, third, or fourth answer? That's where the truth lives.
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The AWE Question can be used after almost any question:
"What's on your mind?" → "And what else?"
"What's challenging you right now?" → "And what else?"
"What would success look like?" → "And what else?"
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You can ask it multiple times in a single conversation (as long as you don’t get annoying).
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I've often wished people would ask me this question. There have been so many moments when I had more to say, but no one nudged me to continue. When someone finally does ask, "And what else?", it feels like permission to think out loud or speak up about things I wasn't sure I should say.
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That's the real magic of this question. It conveys: 𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦'𝘴 𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘮 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦.
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𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗶𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗿 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗻𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗲𝘁𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗿?